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Top 5 Books For Loving A Person with ADHD

The ADHD Effect on Marriage

1) The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps
by Melissa Orlov (Author), Edward M. Hallowell (Foreword)

Awarded “Best Psychology Book of 2010” by ForeWord Reviews, this book is an invaluable resource for couples in which one of the partners suffers from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). It authoritatively guides couples in troubled marriages towards an understanding and appreciation for the struggles and triumphs of a relationship affected by ADHD, and to look at the disorder in a more positive and less disruptive way. Going beyond traditional marriage counseling which can often discount the influence of ADHD, this straight-forward discussion offers advice from the author’s personal experience and years of research and identifies patterns of behavior that can hurt marriages —such as nagging, intimacy problems, sudden anger, and memory issues —through the use of vignettes and descriptions of actual couples and their ADHD struggles and solutions. This resource encourages both spouses to become active partners in improving their relationship and healing the fissures that ADHD can cause. Also included are worksheets and various methods for difficult conversations so that couples can find a technique that fits their unique relationship and improve their communication skills.

Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.2) Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.? Stopping the Roller Coaster When Someone You Love Has Attention Deficit DisorderPaperback – August 31, 2008
by Gina Pera (Author), Russell Barkley (Foreword)

Winner of four national book awards, including Foreword Magazine’s Psychology Book of the Year!
The science has been clear since 1994, when Adult AD/HD was declared a medical diagnosis. Still, the public harbors misconceptions, and that means millions suffer needlessly. And that includes millions of couples who can’t understand why their lives together are so hard — sometimes despite many attempts at couples therapy.
Everyone knows someone with adult AD/HD. Yet we misattribute the symptoms to anxiety, depression, or even laziness, selfishness, or moodiness. Moreover, we assume AD/HD means “little boys with ants in their pants.” In fact, childhood hyperactivity goes “underground” as the person matures, resulting in a mentally restless state. (By the way, the former, and still better-known, official term is ADD, plus or minus Hyperactivity. The new term, AD/HD, uses a slash mark to indicate that hyperactivity is not central to the diagnosis.)

Meticulously researched by award-winning journalist Gina Pera, Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.? is a comprehensive guide to recognizing the behaviors where you least expect them (on the road and in the bedroom, for example) and developing compassion for couples wrestling with unrecognized ADHD symptoms. It also offers the latest information from top experts, plenty of real-life details, and easy-to-understand guidelines for finding the best treatment options and practical solutions. The revolutionary message is one of hope for millions of people–and a joyous opportunity for a better life.

The Couple's Guide to Thriving with ADHD

3) The Couple’s Guide to Thriving with ADHD Paperback – April 1, 2014, by Melissa Orlov (Author), Nancie Kohlenberger LMFT (Author)

More and more often, adults are realizing that the reason they are struggling so much in their relationship is that they are impacted by previously undiagnosed adult ADHD. Learning how to interact around ADHD symptoms is often the difference between joy together and chronic anger and frustration. So The Couple’s Guide to Thriving with ADHD lays out the most important strategies couples can use – right now – to rebuild trust, fight less, disagree more productively, get the attention they deserve, and rebuild intimacy in their relationship. These are strategies honed over years of working specifically with couples impacted by ADHD, and demonstrated to change lives for the better. ‘Thrive’ is the go-to book for couples struggling with ADHD who want to actively work to improve their relationship.

When an Adult You Love Has ADHD

4) When an Adult You Love Has ADHD: Professional Advice for Parents, Partners, and SiblingsPaperback – September 15, 2016
by Russell A. Barkley PhD (Author)
In this book ADHD expert Dr. Russell Barkley explains the science behind ADHD and how you can tell if your spouse, partner, friend, adult child, or sibling may have it. He shows how to guide your loved one toward the right treatment, and what to do if he or she doesn’t want treatment.

Adults with ADHD can be successful, achieve their goals, and live out big dreams and you can help. You can set boundaries to manage your own emotional and financial stress, too. Here you will learn practical steps for helping your loved one accept and manage their disorder, and pursue paths in life where ADHD might not pose such a big problem.

5) The ADHD Marriage Workbook: A User-Friendly Guide to Improving Your RelationshipPaperback – March 1, 2012
by Michael T Bell (Author)
Michael T. Bell, Ph.D has been working with couples affected by ADHD since 1999. He also has ADHD himself. In The ADHD Marriage Workbook, he draws from his own successful problem-solving as an ADHD adult and husband.

Top 5 Books on Fathering

Black Fatherhood- Trials & Tribulations, Testimony & Triumph


1. Black Fatherhood: Trials & Tribulations, Testimony & Triumph by Khalid Akil White and Thurman V. White Jr., October 2016

Khalid Akil White is a father and a professor of African American studies, and he actively challenges the negative stereotype of the “Black Father.” We celebrate his use of personal stories and cultural context against the stereotype of the absentee Father, replaced with tales of Fathering well against harmful stereotypes. Enjoy these beautiful stories of struggle and triumph!

Forty Fathers - Men Talk about Parenting


2. Forty Fathers: Men Talk about Parenting by Tessa Lloyd and Peter Mansbridge, October 2019

Forty Canadian fathers open up about both their own fathers and their deeply personal parenting experiences, including Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, writer Lawrence Hill, academic Niigaan Sinclair, athlete Trevor Linden, restaurateur Vikram Vij, anthropologist Wade Davis, musician Alan Doyle, artist Robert Bateman and philanthropist Rick Hansen. Parenting viewpoints and stories offered from other fathers; candid and vulnerable.

Dads for Daughters - How Fathers Can Give their Daughters a Better, Brighter, Fairer Future


3. Dads for Daughters: How Fathers Can Give their Daughters a Better, Brighter, Fairer Future – Jan 28 2020 by Michelle Travis

An inspiring view of the opportunity Fathers have, not only to raise daughters who are confident and empowered, but to become their ally in the world. An offering of steps, fathers’ stories and helpful resources, to help fathers address inequities in the world, to build a brighter future for our daughters.

Parenting the New Teen in the Age of Anxiety

4. Parenting the New Teen in the Age of Anxiety: A Complete Guide to Your Child’s Stressed, Depressed, Expanded, Amazing Adolescence: (Parenting Tips from a Clinical Psychologist and Relationships Expert) Paperback – Sept. 15 2019 by John Duffy

This #1 bestseller offers a valuable update on parenting the New Teen with an empathetic guide to the emotional overwhelm and psychological suffering our children are experiencing earlier than ever before. Empowering for parents, by understanding and having empathy for our child, we can again become our child’s ally and guide.

The Power of Showing Up


5. The Power of Showing Up: How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired Hardcover – Jan. 7 2020 by Daniel J Siegel

Best selling authors Dan Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson leverage scientific predictors of child well-being into four simple steps that every parent can offer, so their child feels the ‘Four S’s: Safe, Seen, Soothed, Secure’. We appreciate the message that mistakes and missteps are repairable and that it’s never too late to mend broken trust, and the universality of healthy emotional landscapes in children.

Top 5 Books on Mothering

Cat and Nat's Mom Truths


1. Cat and Nat’s Mom Truths: Embarrassing Stories, and Brutally Honest Advice on the Extremely Real Struggle of Motherhood, by Catherine Belknap and Natalie Telfer, March 2019

Cat and Nat are best friends, moms with seven kids between them, and have millions of social fans who turn to them for their hilarious stories and assuring support.  A great BFF conversation!

Live Love Now


2. Live Love Now: Relieve the Pressure and Find Real Connection with Our Kids by Rachel Macy Stafford, April 2020

We like that New York Times bestselling author Rachel Macy Stafford takes the viewpoint of young people, to provide insights, stories and narratives, for how adults can become “the kind of person young people trust”.



3. Motherwhelmed: Challenging Norms, Untangling Truths, and Restoring Our Worth to the World by Beth Berry, April 2020

A true honouring of mothers and the act of mothering, like an advocate or a close friend. This book is helping mothers recognize their own value, so they can guide their children to do the same. Enjoy!

You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom


4. You Are a F*cking Awesome Mom: So Embrace the Chaos, Get Over the Guilt and Be True to You by Leslie Anne Bruce, Sept 2019

Awesome level-setting and story telling for new mothers, written pre-pandemic that provides a well deserved break from Covid19 narratives.

Breathe, Mama, Breathe


5. Breathe, Mama, Breathe: 5-Minute Mindfulness for Busy Moms by Shonda Moralis, January 2017

We like that author Shonda Moralis is a psychotherapist and this book is a National Parenting Product Award (NAPPA) Winner. The promise is that mamas can learn mindfulness in just five minutes! We love having a formula to follow, to make it easier to really settle into a daily practice.